Thank you

Every time I think about the kindness of my friends and parents of friends and people in my life whom I hadn’t heard from in a really long time but who came up big in the “support” department the last 8 months, I get absurdly emotional and can’t choke out my words. When I start to list off the nice things people have done for me it is such a long list that it can easily be misconstrued as bragging but really it’s just the truth. The people in my life are chock full of love and kindness and thoughtfulness and they are really good humans and I want to somehow express my sincere thanks.

I’ll do this by just laying it all out there. Whether this helps you if you know someone going through a rough time, or just feel like listening to me brag, here goes:

[These are in no particular order. Just as it’s come to mind.]

Let the humble brags commence. I received:

• Peapod food delivery. A godsend.
• In Phase 1 of treatment a different friend each week gifted me Blue Apron meals. Although the meal prep was a little overwhelming at times for Mike (hurry, zest that lemon!!!), I got nutrients I wouldn’t normally have consumed like radishes and yea, lemons - lots of lemons! I swear it kept me from getting too sick that first round.
• During the last phase of treatment, the really terrible part, my friends brought lasagnas, prepared meals, meatballs, brownies, etc. They asked what I was eating at the time, or “what I was into.” This was key. Might I repeat this last stretch was hell, the thought of a salad or a smoothie made me want to barf. Thanks to my friends I had lasagna for days, meatloaf for days, even french toast for days!
• Gift baskets / assorted gifts. I received baskets filled with lotion, hand sanitizer, books, slippers, socks, journals, DVDs, blankets, Bananagram, hats, candies - all of which I used.
• Gift certificates for massages or spas - I’m not a normal spa-goer, but after all this I’m a convert! What a relief and time to just lay.
• Visits where the topic wasn’t always on me. Preferably, it strayed away from me and settled on normal conversation - MUCH appreciated.
• Flowers
• My incredible friends gave me something that at first I really didn’t want to accept. They gave me cash. I thought Mr. Pride Mike would have a heart attack ("Give it back!") but of course they wouldn’t take it back, and their instructions for how to use it proved insanely useful: “Here’s some cash for everyday needs, like parking garages, snacks at the hospital, gas.” All of it came in handy as we were constantly tipping valets at the hospital, grabbing quick coffee and snacks, etc.
• Cards. Never underestimate the impact of a simple card, no matter how deep or quick the message. I've kept them all in a special wooden card box, also a wonderful gift from a friend.
• Most recently my friends surprised me with an “end of treatment” lunch - even though I still have some ways to go, they know I had a HELL of a time during my last 8 weeks of chemo.
• Edibles!!! Mike said, “You're on the moon!” after watching me stupidly polish off a whole lolipop then burying my head in the couch. Like, I wanted to be inside the couch cushions, slithering around like a snake. I checked the content of it afterwards, and no surprise, 50mg! Whoops. (After taking a lesser amount a couple weeks later, I was feelin' realllll nice.)
• Dinner out / rides / accompaniment to treatment…priceless
• My former coworkers gave me a sweet 16 package. It was 16 things they thought would put a smile on my face. Delivered 16 days post chemo, when I’d mentioned on this blog that I won’t feel good after my last dose for at least 2 weeks. Hats, M&Ms, a 2017 planner, socks, pens…and more. I got that package and bawled my lashless little eyes out.
• My current coworkers sent me a package while I was out for surgery and included not only snacks and such, but also a container of mustard  + tide sticks. Mustard stains!
  
• Oh, and how could I almost forget: a few friends paid for some house cleanings! How invaluable it was come home to a clean house after a 10+ day at the hospital. Bonus: I didn't have to witness Lily fleeing from a vacuum cleaner like it's the Grim Reaper.
  
  

I know I forgot some things but trust me, I appreciate every iota of help and kindness and good thoughts. Even comments on my Instagram lifted me up, especially when I was posting weird hairless pictures of myself or oversharing about my bloody noses or what have you. Ugh, I'm cringing. But I was just trying to be honest about what was going on.

PS: On the interwebs there are several articles about what NOT to say to people with cancer. This grinds my gears. Sure, I’ve had some dumb shit said to me. But please ignore those lists and just be a good sensitive human. And if someone gets mad at you for asking, “How are you?” - I don’t care if they have cancer or not they're an oversensitive nincompoop. Honestly, throughout this hell, have they not learned anything about what matters?

Anyhooters, THANK YOU.

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